jueves, 3 de diciembre de 2009

El Palurdo Confundido, reca (r) gado

Viene del post anterior, obvio.

Sigue: “En ese contexto, yo soy machista. Mi machismo no consiste en maltratar a la mujer sino en seducirla. La forma de seducirla es hacer una amable y criteriosa ostentación de mi virilidad. Por supuesto que en ciertos momentos esto genera forcejeos. Pero esas “pulseadas” son el condimento de la relación entre el hombre y la mujer.”

A ver… Ostentación: (Del lat. ostentatĭo, -ōnis). 1. f. Acción y efecto de ostentar. 2. f. Jactancia y vanagloria. 3. f. Magnificencia exterior y visible.
JJJJUUUAAJAAJAJAJAJAJAAAAAAAAAA Perdón… sigamos, pero agárrense la peluca porque viene el HIT:

El Palurdo Confundido dice(parabapaaaaappppaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!)

“Yo soy machista porque me agrada doblegar a la mujer.”

OOOOOOPPPPPPAAAAAA!!!

(espacio cedido para la digestión…)

Ripitguitme:

“Yo-soy-machista-porque-me-agrada-doblegar-a-la-mujer.”

“Pero ese ejercicio de superioridad masculina sobre la mujer no involucra maltrato hacia ella y, si lo tuviera que involucrar, me replantearía globalmente la relación con esa mujer.”

Leyeron?

Ok, acá va otra vez:

“En ese contexto, yo soy machista. Mi machismo no consiste en maltratar a la mujer sino en seducirla. La forma de seducirla es hacer una amable y criteriosa ostentación de mi virilidad. Por supuesto que en ciertos momentos esto genera forcejeos. Pero esas “pulseadas” son el condimento de la relación entre el hombre y la mujer. Yo soy machista porque me agrada doblegar a la mujer. Pero ese ejercicio de superioridad masculina sobre la mujer no involucra maltrato hacia ella y, si lo tuviera que involucrar, me replantearía globalmente la relación con esa mujer.”

O sea… Doblegar (Del lat. duplicāre, doblar): 1. tr. Hacer a alguien que desista de un propósito y se preste a otro. U. t. c. prnl. 2. tr. Doblar o torcer encorvando. U. t. c. prnl. 3. tr. blandir1. U. t. c. prnl.

Qué palabras raras elige: doblegar, forcejeos, superioridad... qué palabra tan rara elige alguien que en el mismo párrafo dice que su machismo no consiste en maltratar a la mujer. Qué palabra tan rara elige alguien que expresa lo que marcamos en el post anterior, en el asterisco, se acuerdan? Vayan al post anterior si no. El resumen sería que si una mujer (la Mabel, ponele) no está interesada, él la agarra a cascotazos hasta convencerla de que es el hombre de su vida. Bueno, no tan así, pero casi.

Y va más allá: “Entonces, respondiendo a la pregunta que me hiciste en el blog de Andrea, te contesto que sí, que hay machismo en mi personalidad, que no abjuro de ese machismo y que no tengo el propósito de ocultarlo ni avergonzarme de él porque, además, me da buenos resultados en la relación con las mujeres.”

“me da buenos resultados en la relación con las mujeres”

Buenos resultados??? jijijijijijijijiiiii sorry...

Sigue: “En general, a las mujeres mi machismo les gusta más de lo que les molesta. Las mujeres suelen agradecerme el modo en que las trato porque, en definitiva, para una mujer no hay nada más atractivo y placentero que un hombre con los testículos bien ubicados.”

Wronnnggg!!! A las mujeres nos gustan los varones, no los machos con los testículos bien ubicados y olor a viejo (y no hablo de edad, hablo de CABEZA). Atrasa, todo esto atrasa TANTO que no sé si reírme o llorar. Atrasa el pensamiento, atrasa el razonamiento, atrasa la vida de miles de Badulaques como este que creen que las mujeres en particular (y la gente en general) deben ser tratadas como cosas que se pueden poseer, doblegar y avasallar (RUN MABEL RUN). Y aunque yo adore ciertas "actitudes" varoniles, puedo vivir sin ellas (me gusta que me abran la puerta del bar, pero no hago un escándalo si no lo hacen y detesto que me dejen caminar adelante, por ejemplo). Atrasa porque creen que de VERDAD no podemos vivir sin el macho que nos parta algo en la cabeza y nos arrastre de los pelos a la cueva.

No querido. No. Hay momentos para jugar al machototote, y el resto de la vida, para ser un varón. La inteligencia está en notar la diferencia.

Sigue: “Yo tengo la sensación de que vos tenés una cierta confusión con respecto al machismo y que te cuesta diferenciar un machismo sano y moderado, como es el mío, del machismo avasallante y prepotente, expresado en la situación (que, por cierto, es frecuente) que Andrea planteó en su post.”

No querido, no. Yo tengo una confusión con respecto a casi todo… PERO (siempre hay un pero) no tengo ninguna confusión si pienso con lástima en la pobre boluda debilucha que caiga. Pobre mina. Pobre mina.

A ver, abrimos el modo eMe de Maestra Ciruela y decimos:

Machismo: 1. m. Actitud de prepotencia de los varones respecto de las mujeres.

(O sea, NO existe eso del MACHISMO SANO y MODERADO del MACHISMO AVASALLANTE y PREPOTENTE porque, por definición, ser machista es ser prepotente!!! Ejemplificamos con: “Yo soy machista porque me agrada doblegar a la mujer.”, donde queda en evidencia que no conoce el significado de las palabras que usa).

Masculinidad : 1. f. Cualidad de masculino.

y

Masculino, na. (Del lat. masculīnus). 1. adj. Dicho de un ser: Que está dotado de órganos para fecundar. 2. adj. Perteneciente o relativo a este ser. 3. adj. Varonil, enérgico

(Ejemplificamos con: “para una mujer no hay nada más atractivo y placentero que un hombre con los testículos bien ubicados.” Donde queda en evidencia que confunde algo puramente biológico, con ser un hombre, un varón. Nótesé que la sola existencia de la palabra “masculina” refuerza nuestra teoría. La acepción 3 sería la elegida como aceptable, no?)

Por último:

Varón (Del lat. varo, -ōnis, fuerte, esforzado): 1. m. Ser humano de sexo masculino. 2. m. Hombre que ha llegado a la edad viril. 3. m. Hombre de respeto, autoridad u otras prendas.

(Ejemplificamos con… “…” cri cri… cri cri… sorry, no encontré nada con qué ejemplificar…)

Termina (gracias a dios, a buda, a alá, a todos los putos santos y a la mar en coche) “Espero haberte aclarado la situación y, verdaderamente, me agradaría saber qué pensás acerca de todo esto. Me harías sentir bien si me enviás una respuesta. Te mando un beso muy cariñoso.”

Un beso cariñoso? Bueh…

No entienden nada. Seguramente encontrarán (o ya tengan) una “mina” pero difícilmente van a tener una mujer (RUN MABEL RUN). Que estos argumentos y los de los que piensan/confunden de esta manera no resisten el más mínimo análisis, porque no tienen sustento, ni fundamento y porque solos se ocupan de contradecirse dos renglones más allá. Porque les alcanza con tener “los testículos bien ubicados” y nada más.

Entonces, para resumir y volviendo al Palurdo en particular, ya lo había borrado del MSN, ahora le bloqueé (qué verbo de mierrrrda para conjugar che) la casilla de mail.

Entonces, para seguir resumiendo: la recomendación letrística es: compre una vida, un diccionario, un ventilador de techo para refrescar las ideas y escriba 100 veces no debo.

Cuac!

Diosmelibreymeguardeylavirgenmeproteja!

Vamos yendo, por favor. Circulen, circulen.


P.D.1: la etiqueta RUN MABEL RUN quedará para usos múltiples. Me resulta muy ejemplificadora.

P.D.2: como en el anterior, aclaro que la imagen la saqué de ACÁ.

P.D.3: VARONILES oh yeah! MACHOTOTOTES oh no!

¿Capisce?


159 comentarios:

Miriam dijo...

eMe! Qué enfermito el tipo este! Perfil de exhibicionista, acosador y violador reprimido, que se justifica a si mismo y sus acciones con que "en el fondo a las mujeres les gusta". Me imagino que molesta vía Internet porque en la vida real no se debe animar a joder a nadie.
Me mató el "machismo sano y moderado", es como decir:
- soy un poquito religioso y ser numerario del OPUS
- soy levemente pro raza aria y ser Mengele.

LaTíaPé dijo...

Una vez mas fui tomando apuntes, porque esto es imperdible:
"seducir"...quiere??? daaaale con Pernía, NO-TE-SALE-ROBERTO!
"ostentación de la virilidad"?????
que anda como el de AngeloPaolo y se abre el piloto??? ajjjjj
"doblegá" a tu prima Estelita, que es masoca, infeliXXX
Che..que es "abjuro"?? ahí me cagó, jajajaja (escribe con el Larousse al lado éste?)
Encima quiere respuesta??? propongo que todos le enviemos un mail que diga: "No palurdo, te agradezco. Evitame otro mail tuyo. Gracias! jajajajajajaja

Sublime éste post y el otro, la verdát.

Lagarto Juancho dijo...

Puff... Cronica de una muerte anunciada, por K.O. antes del 7mo. Charly diria... "say no more" pero mi abuelo, que insisto, siempre tenia muchos refranes, cerraria con una reflexión mas acorde:

"el hombre tiene dos cabezas mijo, pero sangre para una sola..."

----------
En fin. El tartamudo la rompió, vendió mas biblias que todos los vendedores de la empresa juntos.

Cuando le preguntaron su formula revelo con esfuerzo: "To-to-to toco ti-ti-timbre... Y le-le di-digo. "ve-ve-ve vendo bi-bi-bi biblias, ¿Me co-co-compra o sse se la-la le leo?

MateConDuraznos dijo...

El uso de ciertas palabras en este sujeto sólo demuestra su violencia, y la idea que tiene de sí mismo como superior. Cosas que van de la mano.
Da asco.

eMe, aplausos por el desmembramiento minucioso de ese mail. Eso, da gusto.

saludos!

Roky Rokoon dijo...

ni pienso leer todo esoooooooooooooooooooooooooo

SANTIAGO dijo...

BATA EME! va a terminar como de niro en cabo de miedo, haciendose un tatuajes con la balanza que diga "todos putos". bloqueele la casilla y listo.

p.d: la proxima vez que corra en pelotas por una avenida, avise que hacemos carrera.

Evi dijo...

eMe, entiendo completamente por qué tu misión era trabajar en ese mail y dejarlo en ridículo al señor... Palurdo (perdón, siempre se me escapa su nombre Don)

Si acaso lee esto, señor, quiero que sepa que corre peligro su integridad físca (y psíquica)... Y soy una persona muy peligrosa, queda advertido. Porque usted las palabras no las entiende (quedó claro en el mal uso que hace de ellas) y quizás necesita ser doblegado por una mujer que tiene los ovarios bien puestos (y es instructora de tres artes marciales... no es joda)

eMe, sin más palabras... (Evi se apoderó completamente de mi luego de leer esto... ¿querés que le mande un saludo a Gise?)

johi dijo...

uuff, es agotador!!!, Palurdo, claramente.

La Furia de la Negra dijo...

Supongo que las mujeres le deben agradecer pq no les queda otra, sino el loco este las doblega, forcejea y avallasa!!! Me imagino que este señor debe tener en la casa todo un set de tortura. Ademas, es mas que evidente que el skinhead este te quiere doblegar ostentandote su no abjurada virilidad pero de manera muy cariñosa.
Por Dios que te pase una foto para hacerla circular entre la poblacion de riesgo, YO HOY NO DUERMO TRANQUILA!!!

Artus dijo...

eMe, tanto este post, como el anterior, a resultado una vivisección del individuo en cuestión. No agregaré más sobre el mismo - en rigor de verdad, me da penita (?) -
Lo único q' podria agregar, es decir: pedirle, q' en caso de encontrarme en una disputa dialéctica, quisiera contarla como mi asesora *o*

Beso su mano, milady
^_^

la tana dijo...

capisco!

eme, seguro que este sorete se aparece ahora diciendo "me encanta que se fijen en mi, en el fondo te gusto"
Por las dudas, ya podrias ir pensando un nuevo microemprendimiento para editar un librito titulado "Ser hombre para principiantes"

beso

fea dijo...

... de otra oportunidad, ni hablar, no?

Johnty dijo...

Mire, el tipo ese debe ser adolescente y estudiar teatrommm. Seguro.
Las emes del final de "teatro" no son casuales, asi pronuncian.

Pero lo que a mi me indigna es el "Run Mabel Run".
Yo no queria saber su nombre, le quita emocion a la cosa.

Polzúnkov dijo...

Capaz que con lo de "los huevos bien puestos" se refiere a que a las chicas no les gustaría que los tenga, que sé yo, bajo una axila... y se siente orgulloso de que estén correctamente ubicados entre las piernas.

BigJim dijo...

ay amiga ya te lo dije mil veces, fijate con quien te juntas!
Este tipo algo esconde (jaaa um camionazo de cosas esconde).
Recurro a mi frase "Llame ya" de cabecera: "Cuando algo te lo explican demasado es que te están cagando..." (o engañando jajaja)
Besoooos!

BigJim dijo...

el "doblega" es un fallido que indica que se la come doblada! He dicho!

eMe dijo...

Miriam: sí, enfermitos todos los confundidos!!! Lo del machismo sano y moderado junto con lo de “a mí me gusta DOBLEGAR a la mujer” es insuperable…

TíaPé: jajajaaa ud. me mata… ROBERRRRRRRRRRRRRRTO no entiende las cosas ;)

eMe dijo...

Lagarto: mire… yo no sé si ud. me va a creer, pero cuando leí el chiste, me tenté tanto que me saltaron las lágrimas. Nunca lo había leído y no sé por qué me causó tanta gracia (digo porque lo leí, al ser contado “en vivo y en directo” es otra cosa, vio?)

MateConDuraznos: muchas gracias. Dan asco, sí, pero creo que también dan pena ;)

Lo bien que hacés, primo Ruku!!!

eMe dijo...

SANTIAGO: ud. no me leyó. Turro. Ya está bloqueado por todos lados. La próxima carrera en pelotas la tengo la semana entrante. Madrugada del domingo, Ezpeleta. Le viene bien?.

Evi: el tema es que me dejó servidos en bandeja los ejemplos para hablar de lo mal que se usan algunas palabras… y me cebé ;) Hágamé el favor de mandarle saludos a Gise, y ojito con ella que es una colega eh? No se me haga la loca!!!

eMe dijo...

Johi: claramente!!!

Negra: nnnaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa… ejemplifiquemos con sus palabras y listop.

Artus: cuente con ello. Lo asesoro a cambio de 1 kg. de choco amargo =)

eMe dijo...

Tana: jajajajajaaaaaaaaaaaaaa me mató el título… Otro podría ser: “todo lo que NO, para ser un hombre” jajajajaaaa

Fea: no sé. A mí no me pidió ninguna, graciadió!!!

eMe dijo...

Johnty: jajajajaaaaaaaaa me hizo acordar a Juana y sus hermanas… qué buen programa!!! No es adolescente, eso es lo peor y, según Carlite, yo me llamo Marta, no Mabel. Mabel, Gladys, Norma… son los nombres que uso siempre como “modelo”. Como el Roberto de la TíaPé ;) Haga de cuenta que no leyó nada, hombre!!!

eMe dijo...

Sr Pol: jajajajaaaaaaaa es ud. muy turro. Sepaló!

Big: gracias a dios nunca estuvo en mis planes juntarme con esto. Así que esta vez, nop, no tenés razón ;)

Big2: ojo ahí eh! No se me había ocurrido. Vos decís?

SANTIAGO dijo...

dele, por colectora vale doble? que apostamos? mire que yo no soy el nene ...

p.d: me habia dicho avenidas más fashion! igual no me achico (aunque el frio hace lo suyo)

SANTIAGO dijo...

eme: le confieso que no lo lei. sabe los hombres somos más simples para arreglar diferencias: lo esperamos en la esquina y le sacamos las ganas de discutir al pedo a los bifes.
si entiende el punto, después vamos a tomar una birrita al kiosko.

eMe dijo...

Santiago... no estoy segura de haberle entendido la propuesta de apuesta. Por eso, y tal como comenté en el post al que ud. alude, me voy al maso y le digo: NO. No le apuesto un carajo!!! jajajaaa
El problema con la carrerita es que todas las avenidas fashion ya estaban a full, y lo mío es la exclusividad, vio? Así que allá vamos, Ezpeletaaaaaaaaaa!!!

Con respecto a lo otro, yo con gusto le pegaría un par de bifes a más de uno, pero, en este caso, he tenido la dicha de NO cruzármeló.
Alabado sea el Dominó!!!

Y lo último, yo no estaba arreglando diferencias, yo estaba mostrando incoherencias!

Sobe!

Evi dijo...

No sé si es una suerte no haberlo cruzado eMe... Yo liberaría al mundo de este mal...

Releo el post y le juro que me hirve la sangre

SANTIAGO dijo...

cuando dice Sobe, me está hablando de la bebida japonesa que promociona el exitoso pell?!

eMe dijo...

No querido, le estoy mandando un beso al vesre.

Ud. tiene poca calle, qué lo parió.

SANTIAGO dijo...

mire no quiero discutir sobre la calle usted ya bastantes energías perdió con el troglodita muerdealmohada del mail. si vamos a peliarnos que sea en igualdad de condiciones.

Natys dijo...

nonnonononononononono boluda tenes un iman para los palurdos eh, lo mas gracioso es imaginarme tu cara mientras leias.

Excelente Post!

eMe dijo...

Santiago: ya venía peleador desde el viernes ud., eh? Venga, tontito, hágasé amigo mejor ;)

Natys: gracias! un imán... creo que es eso...

r.- el corre ambulancias dijo...

lo podes rejuntar todo y venderlo como cronicas de un pelotudo!

eMe dijo...

Jajajajaja, es buena idea Corre!!!

Anónimo dijo...
Este comentario ha sido eliminado por un administrador del blog.
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